So I sat or better laid on the floor wondering what voices had been occupying my ear all day. Most of the day was spent studying and learning, wandering and growing. I thought for a while about a trip to the mountains and how big those mountains were. I thought how they echoed something big and grander than themselves. I thought about a conversation I had with a friend about trees-oaks and palms to be exact. Earlier I had grabbed the guitar and sang a medley of songs. I sang them all in the same key, not changing where the kapo hung on the fretboard. They were all songs I wrote a while ago but felt new in a different key. I had my door shut and I was walking around my room like I was on a rock set. I thought maybe if I had an amp I would probably have kicked it over at some point, for emphasis. I had been studying Isaiah and was hearing the words from the passage I was studying ping-pong in my head. The passage starts out “Ho!” and ends with two words that echo the first, “Lo, Lo.” Cool right?
On the floor I heard the vioces of my friends in the other room and babies from youtube and blog videos. And now as I sit in a chair 15 feet from a main road there is a six year old boy pretending that the pole he is sitting on is a motorcycle… ooh now its a horse. He needs a good leaf pile. Ok, I just sneezed, and he shouted-bless you! What a cool guy… Voices.
Jesus had two vioces echoing in his ears. One was the one that said, “You are my beloved son.” The other vioce was the one that said, “Prove it.” Im trying to hear that first voice tonight. The one that meets me on the walk. When I started walking tonight I heard this line… ‘everything is burning up inside me, i need something i can feel, cigarettes and a driving wheel, oh my god when you cross your legs beside me’. Something tactile, something I can feel and not just hear in my head. A friend’s voice someone to sit next to. What is this violently human impulse? Talking to a friend on the phone today I mentioned a kind of lonliness I had been experiencing and he brought something up that only a counselor might have been able to see… and I don’t remember what it was he said but I know him talking was quite comforting.
I think it was his voice.
